Reinventing Yourself
As the stages of our lives unfold…
… we can find ourselves in new, uncharted territory.
Some of these changes are welcomed while others threaten to unbalance us, filling us with ambivalence and concern in the present and for our future.
Life transitions can be tough to navigate, particularly without guidance.
Many of these “normal” life experiences…
… can really test our ability to make sense of where we come from… and where we are headed. Sometimes there is an accumulation of difficult circumstances that leaves us feeling very shaken about how to proceed.
Here are some of the life transitions we can explore together…
Occupational changes: These transitions can throw us for a loop, especially when we invest so much time, education, money and energy in our work lives. People depend on us. Taking stock of where we are and where we truly want to be can be a valuable exercise leading to new opportunities.
Divorce and re-entering the dating environment: We enter marriage full of hope and commitment to our future partner. Sometimes, as much as we want to stay married, this is simply not possible for a host of reasons and circumstances. Picking up the pieces after divorce can shake one’s self-esteem, cause us to question love relationships, and create uncertainty about when and how to try again.
Miscarriage and infertility: There are a myriad of issues involved in both infertility treatment and miscarriage. Advanced reproductive technology brings with it a roller coaster of emotions and stressors. No matter the factor, male or female, the woman is always the patient. There are big decisions to be made, and women and couples often lack the needed psychological support from the medical community.
Miscarriage can also be a sad and isolating time for women and couples. It takes time to grieve the loss of a pregnancy and to recover and decide the next steps for building a family.
Illness and loss of loved ones: Everyone deals with illness and loss differently. Often, people experiencing grief or being the caretaker of an ill loved one need special support. Grief can be complex and at times prolonged. Depending on the circumstances of your loss, there may be a myriad of mixed and painful emotions.
Intimacy issues: Our bodies and relationships change. These changes can cause significant stress in our intimate relationships. Sometimes we have been hurt and victimized, and intimacy seems just too risky.
Longing for more meaning in your life: One of the great existential questions. How do we find more meaning in our lives? How do we have more of what is truly important to us, based on our ideals and values? How do we transform ourselves and the communities we touch?
Setting boundaries: Some of us come from families or are in relationships where setting boundaries is very difficult – and at the same time essential to our well-being. Boundary setting can extend itself to our workplaces, and even to volunteer work, where we can easily lose our compass and end up feeling depleted and resentful.
Empty-nest phase: We spend the bulk of our lives growing up ourselves and then helping to grow our children into confident, productive adults. Once that big job is mostly done, we may find ourselves wondering what’s next, what’s really important to us now, and the future direction of our life. Reinventing ourselves in new ways can be both daunting and exciting!
Caring for and losing parents: People are living longer, and many of us will be in the position of taking care of parents, experiencing role reversals, often while still raising our own families. Many people need support and guidance during this time to make decisions, clarify boundaries, and deal with the feelings that can be stirred up when taking care of relatives.
Mid-life changes: Mid-life changes can cause significant stress for some. These stressors can result in difficulties with our sense of self, anxiety, depression, confidence, isolation, our level of activity, sleep disturbances, and a sense of apathy and hopelessness about the future.
Launching our children into college and then the bigger world, losing parents, friends and family to illness and age… they all can place great strain on an individual.
On top of that, the changes in our bodies often leave us feeling “less than” – less feminine or manly, less attractive, less… fill in the blank. We can’t turn back the clock, and aging for some is more painful than others.
Menopause and hormonal changes: Hormonal changes for women are real. Just like teens who experience dramatic physical and emotional changes due to new hormone production, the reduction of hormones (estrogen) in women approaching mid-life can result in emotional, physical, and psychological changes.
Psychologically, some women may be more irritable, sad, anxious, or depressed. Physically, some women experience hot flashes, vaginal dryness, fatigue, night sweats, and brain fog. There can also be changes in libido and sexual responsiveness that can cause problems with self-esteem and changes in their intimate relationships.
Necessity is the mother of “reinvention.”
Life transitions are naturally challenging. Often, we are required to step out of the familiar and step into an unknown future.
Even though loss of control can leave us feeling vulnerable without a clear path ahead, the truth is that there is a lot we can do about how we face life’s obstacles.
Although endings and transitions can be painful, they can also be great opportunities for learning, growth, reconnection, self-discovery, and the marshaling of both internal and external resources.
We were never meant to go it alone… I can help.
I can help you realign values, refocus priorities, uncover hidden dreams, and set and realize goals.
In a calming and peaceful setting, we can explore what truly matters to you and what you are all about. Whether life has thrown you a curveball that forces you to take a critical look at where you’ve been, where you are, and where you truly want to be – or you want to make changes and step out of your comfort zone – we can do that together.
We may look at where you get your energy; is it from being with people, or playing music, or learning a new language? Do you feel that you play it safe in life and avoid feeling vulnerable and taking emotional risks? Or is it time for plan B, and you don’t know where to start clarifying how that will look?
Together, we can get where you want to be.
If you are struggling through a transition point in your life and wondering what’s next, I can help you.
Together, we can do an honest appraisal of where you’ve been, where you are, and where you truly want to be.
Please give me a call for a free 20-minute consultation: (571) 289-9181